Our culture is about fast and easy access. Our phones are the fastest they’ve ever been, our food is cheap and our transport is fast. I’ve always wondered if this way of thinking spills into other aspects of our lives? Does this affect the way we talk to people? How we think about life? Is that how we approach our relationships?
With respect to relationships, it seems that our high-paced culture has changed our worldview. Apps like Tinder are a clear indication that we’ve moved from the emphasis on slow, deliberate commitment into a culture that promotes fast infatuation and polyamory. Choosing from a vast catalogue of suitors solely based on looks leads to relationships that are mainly about sexual gratification. This is just plainly false. In Proverbs 31:30 it says “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” From verse 10 on in that chapter is tells us about the “Wife of Noble Character” and these qualities give way to a strong and endearing woman, but they say nothing about her looks or sexuality.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 is the definition of love given to us by God. Exemplifying patience, kindness and humility, this passage explains the selfless commitment that one person has for another and it points to the unbelievable sacrifice that Christ has for the church. This kind of commitment is not something that comes easy nor quickly. Our culture promotes a quick experience and an ‘easy’ alternative. This is not what God made us for, His plan is better and more fulfilling that what the world promotes.
This isn’t to say that there’s no place for attraction or sex in relationships. The Bible outlines in Mark 10:7-8 that a man “clings” to a woman and they become “one flesh”. This verse is preceded by “the man leaving his mother and father”. This outlines that commitment walks hand in hand with physical intimacy. When physical intimacy leads a relationship, commitment takes a back seat; but there’s an appropriate amount of intimacy for every level of commitment. Love as defined in 1 Corinthians 13 doesn’t come easy and it doesn’t come by swiping right, it comes through knowing Him.
In 1 John 4:8 it says, “But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.” Take a break from the fast pace of life and seek Him. Ask yourself what you’re looking for and whether you want the life of purity and promises that God has planned for you?
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